Ephphatha! Be opened. They say the first chapters in any biography are the most interesting. We meet people where they begin, as children, the full weight of their future packed into cute innocence. Although the first seven years of my life were surrounded by violence, I survived at the center of the whirlwind with only whispered scars of angry voices and bad dreams. I was spared the bulk of what could have been. I was loved. I was warm and fed. The anger that filled every crack around me was highlighted by clouds of cigarette smoke and shadows cast on my bedroom door like dragons.
Will I wake up
From this sleeping dream
Dragon smoke-rings Mother,
Reach for me
Scratching shadows
On my childhood sleep
An endless opening
What may be will be
On me, mercy on me, on me, mercy (merci)
Sleep for seven years
Afraid of my dreams
Angry voices calling
Whispering
I love you through my guilt
It’s how I learned to teach
Surviving love that haunts me
Remembering
We carry our childhood through our lives.
Track Notes: Mark 7:33-35 The words of Christ to open a mute man's speech. I have been a fan of William Ackerman for years, and this acoustic guitar riff is heavily influenced by his sparse, beautiful music. It was this drop-D riff that gave me the idea to do an acoustic-based solo album. I borrowed a Taylor acoustic guitar from my friend Chris Whittington (great sounding/playing guitar) and recorded all of the acoustic guitar parts with it. I did that 5 years ago. This is an album that has taken a long time to make. When I started this album, I didn't have any children, and I couldn't play the sitar. Since then, my house has flooded, and my daughter, Von Behr, was born, then my son, Angel, was born. (Certain purists would most likely say I still can't play the sitar, but I get it to do what I need it to do.) The play between the sitar and guitar is really made complete by Trip Wamsley's meandering fretless bass. It's short, but one of my favorite moments on this record is the bridge--when Johnny's big Zeppelin drums come in, and Mandy and Maggie play the super-cool viola and cello parts with an Indian scale.
Frank - Vox, Acoustic Guitar, Sitar
Trip Wamsley - Fretless Bass
Johnny Simmons - Udu, Drum Set
Rob Camper - Egg
Mandy Campbell - Viola
Maggie Fleetwood - Cello
SHADOW
Maybe lots of things. Lots of things that seem pretty certain. Maybe? We see reality through a dark glass, but I hear one day we will see face to face. I was not raised around faith. We didn't go to church. Most people, it seems to me, believe in God, but they are angry with Him. They think He should do things differently. I was raised by people who believed in God but didn't pay much attention to Him. It is the American paganism. We believe in love, we believe in God, and we live in the shadow of faith, love and hope. When I was twelve, I opened the big, stuffed, white family Bible, turned to the middle and found faith. Somewhere in the Psalms.
Maybe there is no sky
Maybe there is no rain
Maybe there is no world without end
And maybe there is nothing
In the Shadow of Love
Maybe there is no Love
Maybe we’re not afraid
Maybe there is no God to hate
And all of His Word is fake
In the Shadow of Love
I hope that we will find faith
It's faith that can teach us to love.
Maybe there is no sound
(And maybe there is something)
Maybe there was no fall
(And maybe we’re alone)
Maybe there is no life before death
Maybe you’re not here at all
In the Shadow of Love
(Maybe there's no Maybe)
Track Notes: Shadow is in open G tuning. Mandy and Maggie, along with Trip and his EBow bass, make a really spooky soundscape for Kemper and me to sing over.
Frank - Vox, Acoustic Guitar
Mandy Campbell - Viola
Maggie Fleetwood - Cello
Kemper Crabb - Harmony
Johnny Simmons - Drum Set
Trip Wamsley - Fretless Bass, EBow Bass
WILDFIRE
My parents divorced when I was seven. This song is not about that. Not directly. When my brother got a divorce, I had a conversation with him, his four-year-old son and his nine-year-old daughter. I couldn't even sing the song without choking up for more than a year. I still might. Divorce is destructive, and the destruction never seems to stop.
Dad:
It was late in the afternoon and the sky was clear
When I felt the tears roll up in my eyes
You said what you had to say
And then you turned to walk away
And took the first steps to walk out of my life
Son:
I was four years old when my world was changed
I still don’t like to talk about it
Everything was boxed up
Then we moved away
Nothing ever really felt like home again
Daughter:
When I was nine, I can’t get it out of my mind
Mom and Dad went their different ways
I was forced to choose and I was the first to lose
When everything I knew went up in flames
All:
Our love is like what’s left after a wildfire
Do you remember all the things that we burned down
I hope someday I’ll learn to understand you
'Cause it’s hard to make much sense of this now
Track Notes: WildFire is also in open G. Yes, it sounds a little like a country song. It won't be the last time that happens. Bart's solo in the bridge is a really cool moment. His band (Occam's Razor) was recording in my studio, and he asked if he could throw a slide solo on WildFire. It was a one-take miracle. A couple of years later, I came up with the harmonies one night just messing around; it's the choir of Franks. The strings added a whole new life to this song. Some have said it is too depressing to include on the album, but you have to admit...it sounds really cool.
Frank - Vox, Acoustic Guitar, Bass
Johnny Simmons - Drum Set
Bart Postlewait - Slide Solo
Michael Selph - Hammered Dulcimer
Mandy Campbell - Viola
Maggie Fleetwood - Cello
CONFESSION
The confession of Malachi and the thief. The book of Malachi accuses the people of God of a lot of horrible things. As I was reading through it one night, I realized that I have done everything the prophet mentioned. So I wrote a song that repented of it all. I feel like the thief who said to Christ, "Please remember me." When I first played it for Kim, she said, "You don't sound like a very good person." I have done much that I regret, and now you can sing along.
I have not recognized Your name
Nor Your love for me
Hear this burden I speak of
I have not given You the honor and the glory
And I have dared to hate Your love
Lift these words up to the sky
Please remember me
I have polluted and poisoned the things You give me
And I have learned how to despise
I have offered You the smallest broken nothings
And I believe my own disguise
From the rising of the sun until the darkness falls on me
I can’t undo this man who I have come to be
I have not done the things I know that I should have done
I have done much that I regret
I have not loved you.
I fail You with my thoughts, words and my own deeds.
Have mercy on me. Please do not forget.
I have spoken death to my soul when I speak against You
And I have stood tall with the proud
I have believed there is no point in following and seeking for You
I have lived as though there is no God
I live as though there is no God
Lift these words up to the sky
Please remember me
Lift this prayer and hear this cry
Please remember me
Track Notes: Confession started out as the rhythm track for someone else's song. A girl named Emily Barker came to my studio to record a few songs. She sings and plays piano. I added sitar and percussion under one of her tracks; I think it was called "Dream." About a year later, I was just listening to the sitar and percussion track solo and got an idea for some music. This music. So, from her song, I kept the sitar, cello and doumbek. I added a completely different chord progression on the guitar and wrote a new melody with different lyrics. Johnny added a bunch of cool percussion and really brought it to life. I like my classical guitar solo. A $50 classical guitar from eBay.
Frank - Vox, Acoustic Guitar, Electric EBow Guitar, Classical Guitar Solo, Sitar, Cello, Harmony
Johnny Simmons - Tabla, Doumbek, Shakers, Kick Drum
Trip Wamsley - Bass
Chris Whittington - Harmony
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A GIRL WITH RAIN
My poetic friend Allison Leal writes some great stuff. This was a piece that she wrote and graciously allowed me to distort into a song. St. John of the Cross wrote about the dark night of the soul. Following the light of faith is often the night of doubt. She knows what is right, she is listening for God's voice, but He seems to be speaking in tongues. Yeah, I've been there.
She needs life inside
But the wind blows there
She has fire in her eyes
But she does not know it
We all crave the holy
But we hate the separation
I taste the rain tonight
As I follow the nameless
I'll wait for You again
The wind makes me hungry
There is no edge of You
And no time for reasons
She's weighed down by these Unspeaking intuitions
A night of silence
The unmeasured voice
A girl with rain
Alone in her dark night
A girl with rain
She knows what is right
God, You speak in tongues
Track Notes: A Girl with Rain was going to be an Atomic Opera song at one time. OK, maybe more than one time. We have recorded it a couple of times for albums, but it never made the final cut. That probably explains the bridge, eh?
Frank - Vox, Acoustic Guitar, Electric Guitar, Sitar
Johnny Simmons - Udu, Doumbek, Drum Set
Stan Nelson - Bass
Mandy Campbell - Female Voice, Viola
Maggie Fleetwood - Cello, Harmony
Rob Camper - Hi-Hat On Verse
LOVE IS ONLY LOVE
I have a wonderful marriage. It is practically supernatural. This song is my philosophy on romantic love. We feel love for people. Romantic love, even. Sexual love. It kills me when people say, "I don't love so and so anymore." As if they don't have any choice. I started loving Kim when we were in high school. I am very blessed to have her to love and for her to love me back. But, here's the thing...I feel the love I have for her when I love her. Verb. Love is something we do. Patience, kindness, giving, and all that. Love is not magic. Love is not God. Romantic love is not the highest and most noble cause in the universe (no matter what your favorite movie says). Those things are lies. Love is only love.
It is a deep breath
You only feel it when you breathe
It is a deep word
You cannot say it when you speak
It is a circular motion
You only have it when it returns
It is a raging fire, love
You only feel it when it burns
We believe that it is the center of our life
It’s not a feeling
Doesn’t mean you cannot feel it
Not a religious thing
Doesn’t mean you can’t believe in it
We trade our life for it
We live and die for it to grow
We’ll stand and fight for it
We only hold it if we let go
We believe that it is the meaning of our life
Love is everything and
Love is nothing more than
Love is only love
Love, it is not God and
Love is not romance and
Love you cannot make and
Love you cannot fake it
Love is something that we all must do
Do you love?
We all believe in it
We all have need of it
We believe that it is the reason for our life
Track Notes: Love Is Only Love came to me after working for a year at a concert hall called Rockefeller's. As a sound engineer, night after night I would see great Texas music acts, and some of the regional music rubbed off on me. You might not be able to hear the influence, but I sure can. Of course, there were a lot of non-Texas music acts that played there, too. Michael Hedges was there a couple of times. I actually met Trip at a Michael Hedges concert at Rockefeller's. His bass on this song is pure funk love, and the strings that Mandy and Maggie played are a trip in themselves. By the way, Mandy and Maggie are twins. They play in the group Clouds Cry. I'm producing an album for them right now. They did all the strings on my record in one very long 15-hour session.
Frank - Vox, Acoustic Guitar, Electric Guitar
Johnny Simmons - Drum Set
Trip Wamsley - Bass
Kemper Crabb - Lots of Harmonies
Mandy Campbell - Viola
Maggie Fleetwood - Cello
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When I met my brother's first child, Cherish, she really touched me. A newborn baby from my own baby brother. I had never really paid any attention to babies before. I wrote this song after that. I wrote it for her, but I was also thinking of my future child...if we ever had one. Kim and I have been together since we were kids. Her maiden name was Von Behren. I always thought it was a cool name, and we used to say we would name our first child Von Behr Hart. Boy or girl, it didn't matter. Well, ten years after Cherish was born, I was waiting on Kim to get finished with her second trimester checkup at the birthing center, and I picked up a book in the waiting room called "Baby Names and Their Meanings." I wanted to know what "Von" meant. Just out of curiosity. Beside the name Von was written two words: "little one." May you believe...
Little One, may you grow
To be happy and healthy
May you always have plenty,
May you Dream
Little One, may your life
Be filled up with living
Be filled up with giving
May you bring love
Little One
Little One, may you learn
To be Faithful and lovely
Helpful and holy
And be wise
Little One, may you know
The strength of the patient
The calm of the gracious
May you find life
Little One
May you sing
May you dance
May you laugh in joy
May you know
Happiness
May you believe in Hope
Little One
Track Notes: Little One is a sort of Irish blessing-type song. The final vocal on the record is my seventeenth attempt at singing the song. I don't mean the seventeenth take, I mean the seventeenth FINAL take. I couldn't figure out how to sing the song. Part of the problem was Emily Barker. She recorded a version of this song for her record. It was so pretty and Kate Bush/Loreena McKennitt sounding that I just couldn't get my scruffy voice to live up to her version. So, I gave up and went for a total "Tom-Waits-scruff"...and there it was. The piano is left over from her version. She did a nice job.
Frank - Vox, Acoustic Guitar, Cello
Emily Barker - Piano
Kemper Crabb - Recorder Flute, Mountain Dulcimer
Mandy Campbell - Viola, Harmony
Maggie Fleetwood - Cello, Harmony
Johnny Simmons - Doumbek
Trip Wamsley - Bass
I love you, but you make me mad. There is a lot of anger in our lives, but most of it is not deserved. The people who we love the most are the only people who can really hurt us, but most of the time, we do it to ourselves. This song really came alive when I came up with the line "Whenever I stand in the way of this thing that we have," because it puts the blame back on me, where it belongs. My friend Thadd Grimm and I were talking about songwriting and, to illustrate a point, I said that anything you say can be a song. Some of the best songs come from carefully listening to yourself speak. Just pick a phrase that sounds cool from any conversation, like, "I love you, but you make me mad."
I love you, but you make me mad
I love you, but you make me sad, sometimes
Whenever I stand in the way of this thing that we have
... It’s too sad ...
I love you, but you make me mad
The things you want I want to give
But I don’t have them in my hands
The times you start
And then you stop
Why can’t you finish all the things you plan
No one gets to me
The way that you can get to me
I love you, but you make me mad...
You want my time, I want yours, too
I can’t control it any more than you
To see our dreams We both must sleep
Then we can speak in the morning
No one gets to me
The way that you can get to me
I love you, but you make me mad...
Only a person in your heart
Can drive you right outside your head
Look where we fall after love
Track Notes: Mad is a dark little pop song. Bittersweet. Have you ever heard a cello solo sound so angry? I kept pushing Maggie, so I'm not sure that she is only pretending. Hopefully she still loves me.
Frank - Vox, Acoustic Guitar, Harmony
Trip Wamsley - Bass
Johnny Simmons - Drum Set
Maggie Fleetwood - Cello Solo
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BABY FORGIVE ME
Kim and I waited until we had been married sixteen years to have our first child. I know you have heard stories about fathers falling in love with their child. I call it "baby drunk." You might even have one of your own. You are not going to believe me when I tell you how far I fell. I didn't want to do anything but hold my little girl for about three years. (Isn't the fact that this record took so long proof enough?) When Von Behr was born, for the first two weeks I held Von on my chest all night and listened to every breath. I had it bad. I would actually feel like I needed to repent before Almighty God if she was reaching for me and I didn't notice. This song is born of that impulse. It is not a dark impulse. It's like a lullaby version of “Cat's In the Cradle.”
I don’t even know how to begin
There’s everything to say
When my baby came into my life
And everything else fades
How many times was she looking at me,
And I was busy looking somewhere else
Ah, Baby forgive me
I won’t even begin to pretend
That I can understand
How my baby can fill up my world
And hold me in her hand
How many times was she reaching for me,
And I was busy doing something else?
Ah, Baby forgive me
I don’t want to miss a magic moment
With my baby
I don’t want a tear to go unnoticed
On my baby…Ah, no.
There is nothing as sweet in the world
As the sound of her voice
When her words are a song in my heart
And my soul rejoices
How many times was she calling for me
And I was busy listening to something else?
Ah, Baby forgive me
Track Notes: Baby Forgive Me is one of Trip's finer bass moments on this CD, although he pretty much rocks all the way through. The voice at the beginning is Von Behr at one year old making little baby singing sounds. She would watch me sing and try to sing along. The guitar solo is played on her toy guitar (kind of a cool sound). I should have used one of her rattles for a shaker...
Frank - Vox, Acoustic Guitar, Harmony, Toy Guitar Solo
Trip Wamsley - Bass
Johnny Simmons - Jimbe
Mandy Campbell - Viola
Maggie Fleetwood - Cello
NOTHING
We live our lives in constant amazement. Frustration. Joy. Despair. Hope. Faith. Doubt. God does not change, truth does not change, nothing really changes.
Everyone who has sold themselves for sin
Want to buy themselves back over again
Telling the same sad stories over again
The future is not a secret from the beginning
All these years change nothing
Day after day, the same routine
Doubt can drive us back to sleep
Faith in the Truth is not group hypnosis
The breath of the wind will whisper peace
All these years change nothing
There is a language of words that cannot speak
Speak the Word and I'll wake up from this sleep
Now that I'm at the center of my life
The darkness of my heart turning white
All These years change...
Telling the same sad stories to children
The future will be here when we begin
All these years change nothing
Track Notes: Nothing shows my love for all things Windham Hill again. Trip's bass and the strings really brought this simple little song alive. The viola solo that Mandy plays is stunning.
Frank - Vox, Acoustic Guitar
Trip Wamsley - Bass
Mandy Campbell - Viola, Viola Solo
Maggie Fleetwood - Cello
SHE'S SO BLUE
Who is she, and what is she doing on my record? Hmm. Well, whoever she is, she walked into a big, pretty church and started arguing with God and trying to be nicer than Him. O, Sister, where art thou?
It’s a stained glass world
And it doesn’t come cheap
But it didn’t cost her a nickel
She walked in right out off of the street
And she sat down
And she looked around
Some words are truth
Some words are lies
She thinks knows the difference
But look her right into the eyes of her façade
You just can't win an argument with God
She tries so hard
But you just can't win an argument with God
When she finds that it's hard to believe
In everything she knows is true
Lead her back to The Way
She can believe in everything that leads to You
She's so blue
Well it all sounds right
But it all goes wrong
Standing on the science
With her faith under a microscope too long
And that’s not where it belongs
It can’t be true
She knows better than that
There’s no way she can believe it
It would be completely wrong and pretty odd
To think she has a bigger heart than God
She tries so hard
But you just can't win an argument with God
It’s a tear-stained world
And it doesn’t come cheap
But it doesn’t cost a nickel
If she has faith and can believe when it is hard, find a way to know it in your heart
She tries so hard
But you’ll never win an argument with God.
She tries too hard
She's so blue
Track Notes: She's So Blue is probably another product of my year spent at Rockefeller's. The Variax does a pretty good impression of a dobro and banjo. The drums are a tambourine played with a brush. The big stand-up bass is a hack job that I bought in Mexico, and it has a unique sound. I have to stuff it full of foam to keep the rattles from being louder than the bass tone.
Frank - Vox, Acoustic Guitar, Electric Guitar (Banjo, Dobro), Stand-Up Bass, Harmony
Johnny Simmons - Tambourine
Kemper Crabb - Mountain Dulcimer
AMEN FOR THE DAY
The moments when we are alone. Defining moments. The light in our eyes when we are born; we are completely weak, yet our entire life is ahead of us. Each day, one after another, the seasons of our life, we live each moment before the Face of God. Amen. Let it be. Amen. So be it. Amen.
When the darkness ends
Then the day begins in a moment all alone
Please remember me
And forget my weakness where I will let you down
Say another alleluia, amen for the day
When I am afraid
When my strength has lost all the will to follow through
Say another alleluia, amen for the day
My eyes look for You
My hands reach for You
I will to always search for You
When my breath is gone and my life is over
Say another alleluia, amen for the day
When You will return and the new life comes
Say another alleluia, amen for the day
Track Notes: Amen For the Day is a piano savant. I have never actually learned how to play the piano, but for some reason, I have always been able to play this song. I really can't play much else on the piano. Only this. It doesn't make any sense, but there it is. I was thirteen years old when my Mom heard me playing on a school piano (we didn't have one at home) and said, "When did you learn how to play the piano?" I said, "I don't know how to play the piano, I just know how to play this." I rented a grand piano for the Emily recording session (it barely fit in the studio). So, one evening after the session, I hit record and played for about fifteen minutes. Years later, I edited the bits together and made this song. You people out there who really play the piano are not impressed, I know, but I think it's "kinda purdy." As usual, Trip, Johnny, Kemper, Mandy and Maggie infused wondrous life into the song.
Frank - Vox, Piano
Trip Wamsley - Bass
Kemper Crabb - Harmony
Johnny Simmons - Bells, Shakers, Jembe
Mandy Campbell - Viola
Maggie Fleetwood - Cello
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Who else did what:
Produced by Frank Hart
Recorded at Digital Penguin Studio (Frank's House)
First Mix by Ryan Birsinger at Rocket Science Studio (Kemper's House)
Final Mix by Frank Hart at Digital Penguin
Mastered by David Hartung at Digital Penguin
Photos by Rob Camper at Times Infinity
Art by Frank Hart
Special thanks: Kim, Von Behr and Angel Hart, Thadd, Pam, Maddie, Ford and Jude Grimm, Johnny and Jenni Simmons, Michele Garza, Trip and Sarun Wamsley, Kemper and Shanna Crabb, Ryan and Amy Birsinger, David and Caroline Hartung, Michael and Pattie Selph, Emily Barker, Chris Stafford, Bart Postlewait, Matt Hunt, Ben Huggins, Wayne and Allison Leal, Max Dyer, Ty Tabor, Kevin and Jemis Lewis, Thom and Gloria Maples, Rob and Vikki Camper, Chris and Mandy Campbell, Maggie Fleetwood, Kristin Jensen, Chris and Joanne Whittington, Jeff and Julie Hart, Cherish and Gabe Hart, Randy and Connie Matlock, Barbara and Bob Hart, Kurt and Jenny Behrent, Michele and Clem Boulter, Gunter Ford, Sheila and Scott Steinsiek, Doug Van Pelt, Vito Rosolino, CrossPoint Community Church, Matt Popovitz, James Zeigel, Bill Woolsey, Tim Miesner, Jason Koch, David Hyde, Sonya Valentine, Mike and Marie Morrison, David Wallace, Eric and Kim VanDevender, Joel Wetzstein, Stan Nelson, Bill Dickson, Jonas and Allie Velasco, FDMB: Sam Hoyle, Brad Farha, Phil Sackenheim, GFH, David Whiteman, Don Norwood, Vince Sahr, Brian and Liz, JJ, Lee Gunter, Gregg, Tony, Mikal, Capt Argo, David G, Ben., MVH, Chad, Kev, 5h4n3, Daddave, DrGonzo81, Dennisaur, Guy, Zen, Joseph and all the others.
Five years ago, Kim and I were going for a walk, and I started assembling a list of possible solo-album songs in my head. I started with 20 and ended up with 12 on the final album. There have been many people who have encouraged me along the way. Many people who have added to the project. Thank you.
It must be said that all glory, honor and ultimate thanks are due to Jesus Christ, God incarnate, Creator and Sustainer of all things. World without end. AMEN.
